Emotionally Abusive Relationships Essay Example

Emotionally Abusive Relationships Essay Example Emotionally Abusive Relationships Essay Emotionally Abusive Relationships Essay Running head: Emotionally Abusive Relationship Emotionally Abusive Relationship Chanda Annon 1204A August 2012 Term Emotionally Abusive Relationship I. Introduction a. People can be in an emotional abusive relationship and not even know it. b. Emotional Abuse can be considered the most painful source of abuse. II. Emotionally Abusive can be considered an non-physical abuse a. It can destroy someone emotionally b. It can make someone feel worthless c. It can destroy your relationship III. Child abuse can be a reason for your present abuse a. Physical Abuse b. Emotional Abuse c. Verbal Abuse IV. What can you do to help with the emotional abuse. a. Talk about your childhood with eachother b. Don’t only focus on your part in the abuse c. Talk about it together to try and figure out the problems V. Conclusion a. You can’t force your partner to understand your way of things. Often times people are in an emotionally abusive relationship and don’t even know it. And when you hear about emotional abuse you might just shrug it off like it’s no big deal. In all reality emotional abuse can be one of the most painful forms of abuse, cutting to the very core of a person, creating scars longer lasting than physical ones. Weather it is one or both partners being emotionally abusive, the relationship becomes increasingly more toxic as time goes by. Over time, anger can build on the part of both abuser and victim, and emotional abuse can turn to physical violence. Emotional Abuse can be defined as and non-physical behavior that is used to intimidate, punish, isolate, or control a person using degrading, fearful, or humiliating tactics. It is not only made up of negative behaviors but also negative attitude such as; not caring how others feel, believing your always right, and believing others should always do as you say. The primary effects of emotional abuse on a victim are depression, no motivation, confusion, low self-esteem, feeling worthless, self-blame, etc. Ultimately, given enough time, most victims of emotional abuse come to not only blame themselves for the problems in the relationship but also believe that they are inadequate, contemptuous, and even unlovable. If you are in an emotionally abusive relationship chances are you had an emotionally abusive childhood. Emotional abuse of children includes abuse such as; physical abuse- when a parent does not provide basic necessities (clothing, food, or shelter). Emotional neglect- when parents show no affection or interest in their child, alcoholics in particular are often neglectful of their child’s needs. Verbal abuse- constantly putting their child down, name calling, and being overly critical. One pattern established by those emotionally abused in childhood is called â€Å"repetition compulsion†- an unconscious drive to repeat the type of abusive relationship we had as a child attempting to get a different outcome. The repetition compulsion explains why, if one of your parents was verbally abusive to you, you will tend to be verbally abusive to your partner and/or children. Emotional abuse or neglect in childhood severely limits a person’s ability to maintain a healthy relationship in adulthood. Abused victims may view their partner as their enemy and focus more on what their partner does wrong instead of right. Not only working on your own problems, and your part in the abuse, you and your partner must work together to stop the abuse from destroying your relationship. Here is a little exercise to better understanding each other: Share your histories, since it is highly likely that you were both neglected, physically, mentally, emotionally, and sexually abused as children. This will help you have a better understanding of your behavior and attitudes origin. Your story does not need to tell your entire childhood, but include experiences of neglects, abandonment, or abuse. After you’ve had a chance to share your stories, sit down and discuss your reactions to the sharing. Include things such as, your reaction to what they told you an how it made you fell to know that happened to them, how your experiences were similar or different, and any connection you made concerning what happened as a child and what has occurred in your present relationship. If your partner doesn’t see the connection, drop it. You can’t force them to see the pattern if they don’t. References: beverlyengel. com/books/emotionally. abuse. rel. htm Susan Forward, Ph. D. , author of Emotional Blackmail Marti Loring, Ph. D. , author of Emotional Abuse and coeditor of The Journal of Emotional Abuse Randi Kreger, author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook and owner of BPDCentral. com Steven Farmer, Ph. D. , author of Adult Children of Abusive Parents and Sacred Ceremony